Monday, July 19, 2010

That's it. I quit.

.... and upon these statements, I can hear the door slam shut in my mind. To be honest, I'm quite content in my decision. Actually it's been the decision that God has been asking me to make for a long while now. Oh, I'd give lip service to "let go and let God"... or maybe sing the song, "God is in control". But really? It was me who wanted to be in control; me who wanted to be doing the doing. Of course, my results were somewhat akin to scaling a greased flag pole. Never even made it off the ground. Or at best, my decision would wreck havoc in the lives of those I cared about.

So what exactly an I quitting? Well, pretty much trying to play Holy Ghost. I've decided that it's not going to be my decision to witness to anyone. Not going to "conveniently" leave tracks laying around; no more religious books for holiday presents. No more "trying" to find somewhere to play gospel music. Not going to attempt any more Bible Studies, not going to go out of my way to find someone to talk to about Jesus; not going to try to turn every common ordinary thing into a sermon. Mowing grass? Yes! Get those weeds of satan out of our lives and let God's grass take over! Nope. no more.

Now, mind you, this isn't the stubborn determination of, "My way or the highway" and me stomping off pouting. No... for once, I think I get it. Jesus has called us to enter into His rest (Matthew 28) and how on earth can I rest, if I'm always on the lookout for that 'one more seed planting' for the Gospel? No, I have laid it down and left it. I've tried to start Bible Studies, only to have them flop, I've gone to play at different churches, only to be left fuming over the error coming from the pulpit. In my attempts of sharing Grace with loved ones, I've pretty much ran them up the proverbial flag pole with them trying to get away from me. Who could blame them?

You see, my job is to simply be available to the Holy Spirit that lives within me. If He needs for me to talk to someone, He'll let me know. It's not a matter of "what if I don't hear Him", but a matter of Him talking loud enough for me to hear him. If I'm available... if I'm willing... do I really have to be scared of missing His call?? How silly. God knows how to work with things. He's gonna make sure I hear what He has to say. Not know? Ridiculous.

On today's broadcast,. the very last caller received some good advice from the co-host Richard Peifer. The caller was wondering the same thing that I used to be worried about. "How can I be sure it's God I'm hearing and not Satan?" The caller was also a musician, and traveled here and there, sharing Jesus through his music. The caller, sincerely as he could, expressed his desire to use his musical ability for God. The advice he received was that it wasn't his (the caller's) talent, but rather, God's talent. God put the talent there, and He'll decide when to use it and where. The caller's "job" was to be available when  and if God had a need for that talent to start flowing. This wasn't only for musicians, but for anyone with any kind of skill. The bottom line, is that the Gospel gets shared. The venue in which it's shared is not to be the limelight--it's simply not that important. When it comes to the gospel that saves, everything pales in comparison.

So, to reiterate, I quit. Godly things are happening all around me, but I assure you, it's not me that's causing them to happen. Me? I'm just staying out of the way. It seems to be working out a lot better that way. I don't have to deal with ulcers or heartburn when folks won't 'respond' to "my" witnessing like I'd like for them to, and God just zips in there and does His thing, and everyone is happy.

Ahhhhh rest! Glorious, heavenly rest! Don't let anyone fool you. That rest that we are invited to doesn't start when we die and go to heaven. No.. that rest starts right here and now, when we accept whole heartedly, the life of Christ for our own. Care to join me?

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